Recent Blog Posts
How Dads and Kids Alike Can Benefit from Virtual Visitation
In recent years, the term “visitation” has largely been replaced with the term “parenting time.” This is due, in no small part, because the concept of visitation is almost always misleading and vaguely insulting to hard-working parents who are invested in their children’s well-being. Simply because a parent does not get to reside with their child as often as their co-parent might does not mean that their relationship with their child has been reduced to visitor status. Countless adults who cannot be with their children every day are stellar parents, both when they are face-to-face with their children and when they are not.
Yet, there is one beneficial area of the American co-parenting experience that has been labeled as a form of “visitation” in a way that is not degrading. Likely because the alliteration of the term makes it easy to remember, the concept of “virtual visitation” is proving to be beneficial for millions of families across the country.
Why Dads Should Stay Off of Social Media During a Divorce
If you are like many people who update friends and family through social media, you may want to reconsider that if you are going through a divorce. You are probably aware that what you say on the internet is seen by many people. What you post or write is automatically captured, and your soon-to-be ex-spouse can potentially use it against you during divorce. If you use social media during your divorce, here are some tips to help you protect yourself.
Digital Age Precautions
Social media can complicate a divorce in the blink of an eye. In this digital age, what we say and post will live forever online. Be careful not to give your spouse any ammunition. These are some tips in case you remain active on social media while divorce proceedings are underway:
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Take precautions and change your passwords on everything from email to social media accounts. This will ensure that you maintain your privacy during the divorce. The last thing you want is for your spouse to get the upper hand from any email communications or to post something inappropriate while pretending to be you.
Should I Tell a Judge About My Wife’s Abusive Behavior?
While most people are aware of the dangers that domestic violence poses to women across the United States, fewer people know how serious and common domestic abuse against men is as well. Men tend to talk less about their abusers, especially when the abuser is their wife, because it can feel emasculating. Worse, research shows that the people men should be able to rely on for help in abusive situations, such as police and social workers, tend to take domestic abuse against men less seriously than the same abuse against women. But no matter who the target is, intimate partner violence is a dangerous tragedy that poses serious risks both to the victim and to his children. If you are getting divorced, here are some good reasons to let a judge know if your wife is abusing you.
Protect Your Child
Rarely do abusive partners refrain from abusing their children as well. If your wife has hit you, slapped you, demeaned you, or publicly humiliated you, chances are that she will one day do it to your child, even if she has not yet. Furthermore, research suggests that abusers tend to escalate their behavior when their victims try to leave, which means your child could be at particular risk of being victimized when you file for divorce. Give the judge the information he or she needs to keep your child safe by being open about any abuse you or your child have suffered at the hands of your wife.
I Want to Get Divorced, But I Am Afraid of Hurting My Kids
Fathers of young children who are unhappily married often stay together for many years longer than they would otherwise because they are afraid of hurting their children. Fears that the child may grow up to have depression and anxiety, to suffer at school, or, worse, to get involved in drugs and alcohol or struggle with juvenile delinquency are all legitimate; research shows that children of divorced parents are at heightened risk of these behaviors.
However, research also shows that fathers can mitigate the negative impacts of divorce by carefully managing the divorce in a way that protects the kids from its most damaging elements. This means that, when done right, you can get out of an unhappy marriage and protect your kids’ best interests.
Parents Have a Lower Impact on Children’s Future Personalities than Previously Thought
While there is no question that parental behavior can shape a child’s attitude and general happiness level at any given moment, research also shows that children’s fundamental personalities seem to be dictated more by genetics than by environment. Adopted children are more like their biological parents than their adoptive parents, and identical twins raised separately are more alike than not.
Can My Spouse Legally Hide Assets During Divorce?
All divorcing spouses must come to an agreement as to how they will divide their marital estate. For some spouses, this is simple and straightforward; for others, it is a long, complicated process. Over the years, women have gotten a reputation for being most frequently wronged by malicious behaviors on the part of their husbands during asset division. However, as more and more women outearn men in the workforce, the exact same motivations that drive men to hide assets from their wives are applicable when it comes to wives hiding assets from their husbands. Some spouses do it to reduce the amount of the marital estate they have to divide; other spouses do it to reduce child or spousal support payments.
If you are a father getting divorced, it is important not to underestimate the chances of your wife attempting to hide assets from you. You deserve the full share of assets to which you are entitled under the law, and a divorce attorney in your state can help you make sure that you get it.
Do Dads Always Have to Pay Child Support After a Divorce?
One of the most common misconceptions about divorce or paternity cases is that, no matter the circumstances, it is always the father who ends up paying the mother child support. However, things are often more complicated than this, and in many states, the laws have been recently updated to give dads a greater chance of involvement in their child’s life. These laws also balance the support obligations between both parents and make it more likely that a father will be able to play at least an equal role as the mother in every aspect of the child’s life.
In fact, more dads than ever now are what are called “custodial fathers.” This may sound like an impersonal technical term, but a custodial father is a man who has the primary responsibility of raising his children - sometimes even without the help of the mother. Custodial fathers are actually highly likely to receive child support from their child’s other parent, especially if they have custody of the child more than half of the time.
Five Ways to Protect Your Finances in a Divorce
Divorce is rarely cheap, but fathers often have to bear the brunt of the cost as they make alimony and child support payments and sometimes even pay for their spouse’s attorney. Making things worse, fathers are often the ones who move out of the house during divorce, meaning they may have to go through the divorce process without seeing their children regularly.
Although some financial difficulties of divorce are hard to avoid, there are certain steps that experts recommend that could help you manage your finances more easily. If you can implement any of these, you may just be able to make your divorce your doable.
Know Your Full Financial Picture
Although some couples feel painfully aware of how little they have, others may not be fully cognizant of their total financial picture. This is a mistake because you cannot fight for your fair share of marital assets if you are not sure what they are. You should know the balances of any savings accounts, retirement accounts, or credit card bills, as well as whether any tax refund is likely in the upcoming year. If you have a prenuptial agreement detailing your property in a divorce, review it now.
How Can I Visit My Kids if I Live in Another State?
One of the most significant challenges following divorce is adjusting to life in two single-parent homes. For children, this can be a particularly hard transition, especially if movement between parents is chaotic and unpredictable. For fathers, it can be a time filled with conflict, uncertainty, and the fear that spending less time with your children may result in a more distant relationship.
For fathers who live in a different state than their children, this fear can be particularly acute. You may not be able to afford to transport the children between their other parent’s home and your own as frequently as you would like. You may find it difficult to talk to them on the phone, especially if their other parent tries to prevent electronic communication. Fortunately, even if your children move to another state, you can still ask a court to instate a visitation order that allows you to maintain a warm, close relationship with your children.
How Can Dads Stay Connected to Their Kids During Divorce?
Divorce is a time of major emotional upheaval for parents and kids alike. Parents are frequently so busy trying to negotiate a divorce settlement - much of which is done with the kids’ best interests at heart - that they forget to pay nearly as much attention to the kids themselves. The result can be grumpy, misbehaving, upset kids, and a befuddled parent who does not understand why the kids cannot see they are doing their best.
Fathers in particular stand the risk of becoming alienated from their kids during and after divorce, both because of actions ex-wives sometimes take, and because of uncertainty about how to best stay connected with their children. If you are a father of children getting divorced, you can act to maintain a strong relationship with your children, no matter what your ex is doing.
Fight For Your Relationship with Your Kids
What Is Dissipation of Assets, and How Can it Affect the Divorce Process?
No one goes into a divorce expecting it to be easy, but most people do not realize just how complex and challenging the financial aspects can be. There are a number of financial issues that a couple will need to address during divorce, from dividing their assets and debts to figuring out whether one spouse will pay child support or spousal support to the other. If these issues are not handled correctly, a couple may encounter contentious legal battles that may drag the divorce process out for multiple months or even years, resulting in additional expenses and financial complications.
As a couple works to divide their marital assets, they will need to be sure they fully understand the extent of property they own, the value of different assets, and the steps they can take to ensure they will each have the financial resources they need going forward. This process requires spouses to be completely open and honest with each other about all financial issues. Unfortunately, there are many cases where spouses may conceal information from each other and attempt to unfairly influence the property division process. Matters may become even more complicated in situations where one spouse has acted in a way that has caused financial harm to the other. In cases involving the dissipation of assets, a spouse will need to work with an experienced Chicago divorce attorney to determine how to address this issue.
